Tuesday, 10/19/10

Yet another day in Oaktown. Yippee.

Logan's counts were still down this morning at .4, platelets were down, hemoglobin was down, blah blah. So more of the same. I'm tired of giving hopeful commentary (not to say that there's a whole lot that's better to report anyway -- despite Logan's protestations that "My whole body is better! I want blue soda NOW!') only to have to go back on it 24 hours later. So in lieu of that, I'll just list the things we need prayer for. I'm not in a place where I can really pray because I'm having what I'll simplistically refer to as 'faith issues' at the moment, but on the off chance that God is listening to ANY of you these days, I want you to know what we need.

- The inflammation in his gut to heal itself ASAP. Per yesterday's CT scan, the majority of his tummy distension comes not from fluid, but from inflammation. The tissue is very, very inflamed. Not only does it make it harder for him to breathe, but it presents a potential danger with respect to his shunt. In rare cases, bacteria from infected fluid in the stomach can travel up through the shunt (which drains in his tummy) and into his brain. Needless to say, that would be very, very bad. So pray that that tissue will get on the fast track to improvement. If the inflammation goes down, the fevers should go away and his WBCs should recover.

- No 'negative' progress. One of the dangerous aspects of an aggressive tumor coupled with a delay is the elevated chance for re-growth. Pray that any progress that's been made via the first two rounds of chemo will hold their ground despite the delay we're facing with beginning round 3. We're likely at least 2 weeks from starting over again, and to say that I'm afraid of what could happen over those two weeks would be an understatement.

- For me, that I'll be able to let go of the anger and bitterness. I'm bitter over lots of things these days. Over every time I drive into that infernal parking garage, over the delays, over the whole darn situation. But in this case, I speak specifically of the doctors and nurses here. As it turns out, I was right: There was a 12-day gap between tests for c-diff, and there's a good chance that had it been caught earlier, it might not have gotten as bad as it is. I'm angry over that. Really, really angry. In tandem with this, also pray for the staff to have wisdom with respect to his treatment. I feel a loss of confidence in them at the moment.

And anything else you can think of. Thanks.