The Logan Update: 11/28/10

Between the holiday season and the unexpected joy of Logan being at home with us for the past 2 1/2 weeks, it's gotten progressively more difficult to update! But I wanted to be sure to do so now, as we're just days away from heading into cycle #4.

I left off with my brief recap of our disappointing-turned-frustrating-turned redeemed (yes, I can call it that!) Thanksgiving Day. Although the way it began broke my heart, a few days removed, I can see it for what it was: A heavenly kick in the pants! I'd been stressing over why we were receiving the gift of holiday-time with Logan at home rather than just accepting the time for what it was and is: A big, unexpected blessing. So the way I see it, what happened was God saying to me 'look Sherry, I'm giving you this great thing you never expected. If you don't want it, then fine, I'll take it away'. Now, a few days later, I can look up, respond with a hearty thank you and a message received! and pray for more miraculous things.

Anyway, I was truly impressed with how quickly Logan recovered from the line placement. He had a single shot of morphine after surgery, but otherwise, has been a-okay. Friday was a cool but pretty day, so we ventured out to the Christmas tree lot by the fairgrounds where we've always gotten our trees in order to pick one out. Logan was super excited about going, so we had a little troop of bell-ringing, singing short people in the back of the van as we made the trek. Given that we were just a day removed from turkey and cranberry sauce, the lot was pretty empty, giving them lots of room to run around and play. The pre-big C diagnosis me would've had them on a tight leash, forbade running, stifled laughter and shrieking to a dull roar... but not now. All three acted a little crazy, and I let them because they're kids. And they were having fun, and there was no one else there to be bothered by their chicanery anyway. And it felt freeing.

Saturday we decorated the tree with a large handful of my massive ornament collection; another activity that was very much on Logan's 'wanna do' radar. There was plenty of silliness and goofing off; so much, in fact, that we repeatedly had to remind all three kids to be careful of Logan's lines, to slow down, to take it easy. Today, Sunday, involved Adam taking the other two kids to church while I hung out at home with Logan. We didn't do anything special, but it was just so nice to sit with him and be for a little while. I pulled out the video camera and did a little 'interview', which was fun. Then we headed over to Arby's for lunch, since that's what he said he wanted, and Adam met us there with Abby and Isaac shortly thereafter so I could head off to a baby shower put on for me and another lovely gal by the Centerpointe ladies (thank you!).

Daily recaps finished, he really has been doing remarkably well, and for that, I sing praises. Medically, he shouldn't be doing as well as he's doing. But I'm telling you that God has intervened in a mighty way, and as a result, Logan is almost vintage-Logan normal. He's goofy, he's silly, he's sweet, he expresses affection more freely than anyone else I know, and he has actual energy. Less than pre-diagnosis, but not much less. He is, naturally, weak and gets tired more easily, but it doesn't hamper his spirit and his tenacity. He's an absolute portrait of resilience and strength of character. It takes my breath away every time I stop and realize that he's not wasting time feeling sorry for himself or asking the big 'why me' question that plagues adults. When he feels good, he plays and acts silly without prejudice.

So all of that beings me to the present, and to the week ahead of us. It's a week that will involve family photos tomorrow courtesy of Chrissy (thank you!), the RSV shot for Logan on Tuesday, and then pending good bloodwork, a return to CHO for cycle #4 on Wednesday. Please pray for another excellent cycle with minimal side effects that will allow him to come home again for an extended time, and of course, for complete eradication of the tumors and healing. Especially with baby boy due in just 3 1/2 weeks, we need things to go as smoothly as possible. Of course, I know that God is in control, but prayers never hurt!

I'll try to be back with more tomorrow, since I know I've been a slacker of late and I don't want to forget anything essential. Until then, bless you all and may the joy of the holiday season overcome you in a new and special way.