Tuesday

Some women find themselves suffering from headaches while pregnant, but not me. Nope. Nary a one. I get them after I give birth. So forgive me for being brief, but I have a raging headache at the moment yet wanted to give a quick update on Logan and the wider 'us'.

He was indeed discharged today at around 2 PM. He and Adam got home at around 3. I'd had something of a crazy day, so I was happy to see them, and was even happier to see Logan round the corner into the family room and immediately ask where's the new baby? I want to see the new baby!' Said baby was asleep in the porta crib, and Logan's face morphed into his trademark huge grin as he peeked in on Brady. He really does have an affinity for his new brother, and it warms my heart.

Since he's now recovered and we don't have to deal with him being neutropenic, he was allowed to choose our dinner destination, and opted for what had been a frequented Saturday lunch locale during the months leading up to his diagnosis: Sweet Tomatoes. He hoovered his cheese and a few other items, and then before everyone was finished eating, demanded that we leave. It's one of the challenges of dealing with him these days: He gets what he wants when he wants it while at CHO, so it's hard for him to come home and become part of the physical family unit once again. But we stay strong with him, telling him that yes, we know he'd like to go, but that as a member of the family, he needs to be patient and wait for everyone else to finish first. Honestly, it's frustrating, but it's a small price to pay for having us all together again.

While I'm on the subject of togetherness, I want to touch briefly on something super mundane, but super meaningful to me. Tonight marked our first trip out in the car as a family of six. Four filled car seats. There were times a few months ago when I worried that it would never happen; that we'd bought our minivan in vain back in July. But no, because we've now used it as we intended to use it when it was purchased: To carry our four children. And it felt really, really good. It was almost as if I could exhale just a little, over something as simple as those few minutes riding along in the car, even if Brady was screaming and Isaac was making loud, odd noises, and Abby and Logan were singing to try to get the littlest guy to calm down. There was a harmony underlying the cacophony, and I don't think I'll forget it anytime soon. A simple, everyday moment that we all take for granted was magnified in a brand new way.

When we got home, we had a quick visit from the owner of Abby (and Logan)'s dance studio (thank you, Sherri; I'm truly blown away), and then Adam hooked Logan up to his TPN and antibiotic pumps with no issue. When I went upstairs to say goodnight, he was already nearly asleep, so I sat beside his bed as I've done in the past and just prayed. For wisdom, for patience, for healing -- for eradication, pulverization of the tumors, for cleansing, for restoration, for sealing and future protection--, for peace. For all of those simple things that seem so elusive at times but that I know, that I believe, are just around the corner for our family. When I'm able to clear the cobwebs and busyness from my mind, praying is such a soothing activity for me these days. Such a solace from the storm.

So anyway. Thank you so much for your continued prayers. Please pray for good health for our family and for a good Christmas season. And as always, for healing for Logan! Blessings to you all, and remember the reason for the season as Saturday approaches.