About Us

Our family of 6 (dad Adam, mom Sherry, big sister Abby and little brothers Isaac and Brady -- who was born on December 14, 2010) joined the ranks of pediatric cancer fighters when our 4-year old son Logan was diagnosed with a dangerous and highly malignant form of brain cancer in mid-August 2010. Logan's cancer journey began abruptly on Sunday, August 15, when his right eye suddenly turned inward during dinner. Twenty-four hours later, we were checking into Children's Hospital Oakland and finding out that life sometimes takes you places you'd never, ever imagine yourself going.

Saturday, April 2, 2011

The Grindstone

I've typed and deleted numerous opening lines for this entry. I just can't put what I'm feeling into words, so perhaps bluntness is my friend tonight.

I really need hope. I need signs. I need encouragement. I've had my nose pressed against this grindstone for so long now that the skin has worn off, scabbed over and been cut open again more times than I can count. It's not so much that I feel like there's new, fresh skin exposed. No, it's more that I'm so numb that I've lost a lot of sensation. I'm not feeling a lot of the acute pain anymore, which isn't an entirely bad thing, but I'm also not feeling the joys. And with that, I take issue. I don't want to be cheated out of feeling happiness when there are pleasant moments to be enjoyed.

So please pray over those things, if you will. Please pray for health for Logan and for our family. Pray for signs and encouragement, and pray that I won't be so numb that I'll be unable to recognize them when they appear. And as always, pray for the salient desire of my heart: Healing for my little sunshine. Thank you, and have a blessed Sunday.

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6 comments:

  1. LoisApril 2, 2011 at 11:09 PM

    thinking of you. praying for you as always...

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  2. shelly starkeyApril 3, 2011 at 3:29 AM

    I believe that when you are facing a trial or a tragedy, numbness is the emotion that precedes joy. Just get thru the momentary numbness and you will be able to once again enjoy those pleasurable moments. Healing is coming for Logan, Sherry. I believe it. Sometimes you just have to get out of the boat, walk on water so to speak, to reach the shoreline. Your "shoreline" is within sight - the complete healing for Logan is within sight - your faith will get you there. Hang on, our prayers will float you thru this. Much love, michele starkey

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  3. Sharon KuhfalApril 3, 2011 at 4:17 PM

    Thinking and praying for all these things!

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  4. ZoeyApril 3, 2011 at 6:08 PM

    Praying everyday...

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  5. kari.jacksonApril 3, 2011 at 7:38 PM

    Praying all the time, everyday Sherry! I wish I could just "unplug" you and your family from this mess, even if for just one day :( Praying that God will give you strong, clear signs that will keep your morale high and your strength up. I really want to tell you a couple notes from our sermon today but I can't at the moment....I will try to msg you on FB soon. Til then, lifting you UP UP UP!!!

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  6. NancyApril 3, 2011 at 9:03 PM

    Catching up on Logan over the past few days and wanted to comment on your "Me-Do-It" Post. You are amazing... to be able to write like this in your sleep-deprived, cloudy worried mind. I absolutely love this and need to adopt it for myself. Thank you Sherry. Still praying... lots. And, you and Logan are even more in my prayers as I'm experiencing loss of hearing in my right ear - exact cause unknown, but to me, it's an extra constant reminder of Logan. (and you... I hope your ear infection is better)

    Love to your entire family,
    Nancy

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