Friday

Sorry, I know I've been remiss with updates. The truth is that there's just not much going on. Not much has changed and Logan is still in the ICU on the BIPAP machine, mostly not responsive, though I did have a sweet moment that brought me to tears this afternoon. I opened his right eye for him and held up my hand in the 'I love you' sign that we've used for years. For just a moment, he held up his own little hand and waved it back at me in a like-pose. It made me cry to realize that he could see me and that he loves me, too.

The report from Dr. T this morning was not a good one. He said that they're thinking that perhaps the cause of the fluid retention, the swelling of his ventricles and the other problems he's experiencing might be aspergillosis. Remember the aspergillus infection he had in his ear in October? Same thing. The theory is that it's been slowly growing and spreading and wreaking havoc over his body. If that's the case, there's nothing they can do for him medically. So we're in full-on miracle territory. Although this isn't new news for us, it feels more urgent. It feels more pressing. It feels decidedly more painful. After all, our family has suffered SO MUCH over the past nearly 18 months. But I still doggedly hold on to the notion of healing. Christ told his followers that the world would know Believers because they'd cast out demons, lay their hands on sick people and cause them to become well, and a host of other qualities. I believe this is true. I also believe that the devil --and ironically, the church at times-- stifles us. We've been programmed to believe that we DON'T have the ability to let God work through us via the Holy Spirit. And because of that --and probably for other reasons as well-- we often don't even try. And if you don't believe... well, Jesus repeatedly emphasized the importance of belief. It's an essential component of faith. Anyway, that's the update. Thank you for being on Team Logan and for continuing to pray for my sweet sunshine and our family.